What exactly is Sex Therapy? (written by Heather England)
Many people have an idea of what sex therapy and sex therapists are like based on movies like Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers or the popular Netflix series “Sex Education” but like all stereotypes, those ideas are often pretty far from the truth. Our sexuality is such a fundamental part of who we are. Maintaining positive sexual health is vital to our happiness and relationships. If we are experiencing a problem with our sexuality or sexual expression, it often impacts our entire lives.
Many people grew up in homes where no one discussed sex or they were shamed for any type of sexual expression. Others experienced shame about their body or their sexual interests or fantasies. And others had a decent enough sex life until something happened such as getting married, having a baby, losing an erection, menopause, a health crisis, or other major life events. By the time someone finds my website, they have often been struggling with a sexual issue for a long time. Being alone in that struggle or fearing your relationship is going to fall apart because of a sexual issue is overwhelming. Kudo’s to you for having the courage to reach out and ask for help.
It may feel icky and really uncomfortable to consider talking about sex with a complete stranger. I completely get it. But I do this all of the time so please trust that I will help make it ok for you to talk about your sexuality. You may find it’s a big relief to share some of the things that both you with a caring therapist.
What kinds of things do we talk about?
Sex therapy involves talking about your sexual health and your relationship with your sexuality. Some of the things we talk about are listed below, but from my experience, the main topics are a desire mismatch between partners, low desire, painful sex, erectile difficulties, inability to have an orgasm and boredom with your sex life. Here’s a more comprehensive lists of many of the things clients and I talk about:
- Discomfort discussing sexuality
- Desire mismatch between partners
- Low Sexual Desire
- Pain During Sex (Vaginismus, Dyspareunia, Vulvodynia)
- Difficulty with Erections/Erectile Dysfunction
- Difficulty with Orgasm
- Infertility and Sex
- Post-Partum Sexuality
- Erectile Dysfunction
- Premature Ejaculation
- Delayed Ejaculation
- Performance Anxiety
- Concerns about pornography use
- Sexual and Emotional Affairs
- Sexual Abuse or Trauma
- Gender Expression/Sexual Expression
- Issues with Pornography
- Out-of-Control Sexual Behavior (a.k.a. Sex Addiction)
Why work with Heather?
I’d love for you to choose me as the person to help you be confident in your sexual expression. I work very hard to make talking about sex as comfortable for you as possible. I have had TONS of training. I graduated with a Certificate in Sexual Health from the University of Michigan and have taken many, many additional courses. I am a member of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
And besides that, I’m a really nice person. (I thought I’d throw that in for those of you that read this page all of the way to the end!)
Please reach out via my contact form or email me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org if you are ready to jump into this subject. It’s a lot like jumping into the deep end of the pool off of the high dive: sometimes, you just need to take a leap of faith and jump.